INSIDERS AND OUTSIDERS
Dear Friends,
Every church has a “force field” that keeps guests and seekers out. Some churches want to keep people out. More churches do not. Some churches only want certain people to become “regulars” - the right age or social class. Most churches would be horrified if God revealed to them that they wanted to exclude based on income or race or education. Most people who are “regulars” or “insiders” at a church are not aware of the force field in their church, which pushes people away. We insiders are also not usually aware of the specific behaviours and attitudes that we have which contribute to pushing people away. I remember one long-time member of the church (who has since left) who said out loud, “When will all these new people leave so we can have our church back.” Even this person was probably not aware that they wanted an even more powerful force field to exclude.
So what can we do? Here are a few suggestions:
1) Please pray that our church will become great at helping “outsiders” become “insiders.” Pray that God will work in our church so that our force field will become weaker and weaker.
2) Please pray for yourself! Ask God to show you aspects of your behaviour or actions which are unwelcoming or insular or “pushing-away.” Ask God to help you develop actions and behaviours that are welcoming and hospitable.
3) Commit to following the “5 minute rule.” Before the service ends, notice someone you have not greeted before and commit to approach guests and “strangers” for the first 5 minutes. Please note, most of us unconsciously seek out our friends in the first 5 minutes. So we need to commit to seeking out “new” people first.
4) Don’t wait for others to do these things before you do them. Don’t say, “I’m going to wait till the leaders or the old-timers or the extroverts do this before I do.” Instead say, “Father, help me to start doing what I can even if no one else steps up.”
5) Consider whether God is calling you to “step-up” and take leadership in this area. I know we need help in turning “outsiders into insiders.” I know we need help in being hospitable to people who are guests for only a week or two. I know we need help in connecting people to other people in life affirming ways. Maybe God is calling you to step-up and help by providing leadership in developing and implementing concrete steps to help us be welcoming. Pray about this and give me a call!
George +